Pizza With A Scare
By Robin Darking
I have a few close friends, and sometimes we get into some weird, yet amusing, situations. In my ‘group’, there are three of us: Christine, the loudly outspoken one who teases mercilessly and enjoys doing crazy things for laughs; Katie, the pacifist who self deprecates simply to make other people feel better about themselves; and me, who gets easily offended by Christine and placated by Katie and generally is in the middle on the passive to aggressive scale.

As I mentioned, Christine likes to do some rather crazy and insane things (like asking for potato pizza at Pizza Hut), and Katie and I laugh along with her. One evening we were grouped at my house and feeling hunger pangs, because as per usual there wasn’t much in the way of food in my fridge. We decided to order out for some pizza. Christine is vegetarian, so we ordered a cheese for her and a taco pizza for Katie and I.

Christine asked the pizza guy for potato pizza for about ten minutes when she finally gave the guy a break and ordered for real. At my house, there is a guard at the gate because I live in a townhouse complex called Shaughnessy Place. Whenever there are visitors, cabs, or delivery food people they phone up to the house to see if someone is home, and if the person is really supposed to be visiting. Of course, Christine saw this as opportunity knocking for another one of her escapades.

The phone rang, and I answered it. The pizza guy was here, and it being so dark out, Christine was planning on scaring him as he approached the house. Between the walk to my door and my patio is a 6 foot wooden wall with a few knot holes here and there. Christine took the liberty of hiding behind the wall and peering through the knot hole. We saw the pizza guy get out of the car and his assumed girlfriend hand him the pizza box bag. Katie and I ran back inside and I got the money ready. We were waiting for the pizza guy to ring the door bell when we heard Christine yell in a high pitched voice

"Ooooooh! Pizza! I loooooove pizza!!! Give me pizza!!" and then the scream of the pizza guy as he ran back to his car. Christine had waited until he was right beside her on the other side of the fence to scare the pants off him. She collapsed on the floor laughing her head off while I tried to keep a straight face when the door bell rang. I opened the door to see the pizza guy and his girlfriend standing there. His girlfriend looked extremely ticked off, I assume she did not want to get out of the car.

I tried not to laugh by not meeting eyes with them, and it was obvious that they thought it was me who had yelled at the pizza guy. I gave him the money and shut the door, bursting into laughter. I then heard Christine scream at the top of her lungs, and then the sound of a car door slamming and said car roaring out of the driveway. Christine had taken the second opportunity to scare them again.

I suppose it was hysterically funny to Christine, Katie, and , but to the pizza people it probably wasn’t quite as humorous. I hear delivering pizzas, like any other type of door-to-door job, can be quite dangerous.

Pranks like that are always goods, as long as both parties can enjoy it, and as long as no one is in any real danger. One should always be careful when pulling pranks to make sure both parties will not react badly.

Venture home.